Wrap it up for Safety

I just remembered one from way back.
It was winter and the building ownership was taking out old insulation and putting new stuff in.
So they stacked the old stuff in a parking stall in the basement.
One of the employees from a colder state said. "Can I use the insulation to put around my car engine when I am here for late hours?"
Now I don't know enough to know if that's normal. But it wasn't that fucking cold. Snowy yes, and wet but not Antarctica cold.
I say no. I do not think it is the best idea.
But they do it anyway.

The next morning. They come to my desk.
Him - "Can I get help?"
Me - "Sure whats up?"
Him - "Remember that insulation?"
Me - "... yes... " sigh
Him - "I need help getting it out of my car."
We go down to the basement. This tard put insulation all around his engine and stuffed a good deal down near his fucking engine fan. And promptly forgot.
And started the car.
That shit was EVERYWHERE. It was in fan ducts, blown out into about 8000 pieces into the basement.
It looked like 5,000 stuffed animals had committed suicide all at once.
We spent HOURS cleaning it.
And it still didn't matter. Burning insulation every time he drives it. (which I think is cancer causing)
Fuck it.

The Gate to Nowhere

Because no one got hurt I will post this one. Its just stupid dangerous.
We have roof mounted mesh door for our driveway so that we can lock it after hours, you know the ones that slid up and down.
One of the employees comes to me one morning.
Her - "I have a problem"
Me - "Ya?"
Her - "I hit the gate downstairs with my car."
Me - "Lets go look."

So we go downstairs and see, that she has not only hit the sliding mesh but much of it is hanging over her car. I call building management who shows up.
Me - "So what happened."
Her - "Well I tapped it and it didn't open. So I tapped it again a couple of times."
Me - "Why did you tap it."
Her - "I thought it was pressure sensitive."
Me - "Pressure sensitive means car weight. You don't tap it, it senses that you are parked on a spot and it opens the door."
Her - "Oh."
Me - "And the big sign that says "Push button on remote" is there to show people that they have to use the remote to get it to open."
Her - "I thought it meant something on the door itself."
I look at the sign. Which shows a keychain and a big finger pressing a button.
Me - "Uh...huh."

Her - "Well I need to call the owner of the other car."
Me - "Say WHAT?"
Her - "Well I tried to park and scratched another car."
So I follow her to her car, and the bit of the mesh that is stuck out the side of the car had scrapped down the side of another car.
It looked like the other car had sideswiped a fucking rhino.
Her - "Do you think building maintenance will pay for the damage."
Me - "No... not likely. "